Waiting For My Miracle

Several years ago, God spoke to me through another person in our then church community and gave me prophetic word. What the man told me immediately connected with my spirit and the things that I had already felt God speaking to me that quite frankly made no sense.  I received the word, but went home and argued with God for 3 days.  Maybe argue isn't the right word.  In that three days, the first 3 days of a 21 day Daniel fast, God allowed me to feel all the frustration, pain, despair, joy and hope that I would eventually feel through the course of the last few years.  I pleaded, begged, tried to make deals, and finally told Him "this is pointless, we both know I'm going to be obedient".  I contact a couple of close people in my life, shared the word I had received and asked for not only prayer but for accountability.  You see the Word held not only instruction, but also a warning and a promise to be fulfilled for my obedience. 

     About 4 months later, a woman in our church came to me and began confirming exactly what the first word had said  She also gave me clearer details based on things I had not shared with anyone.   This is always my way of knowing this is God speaking through someone.  When they know nothing, but seem to have details no one but God would have.  And just like the original word had said "sometime this year..." exactly 10 months to the day things began to happen.  Over the last 4 years I have watched this word unfold...not the way I had thought or the way I had hoped.  Each little piece of the puzzle, each little tidbits come to pass.  The most uncomfortable  ones being friends coming against me, people telling me this isn't what I should be doing, and the price I would eventually pay for my willingness to walk in obedience.  God didn't lead me this way blindly. I knew every step what it would cost me.  And all along the road there have been so many confirmations, just when I needed them the most.

There have been rough days, rough weeks. There have been a lot of prayers and tears.  I'm honestly not certain which would number highest, but the number of times I have broken down before the Lord, begging for an answer, begging for full breakthrough.  Do I hold on?  Do I let go? There have been times when I needed an answer straight from him and looked up and there it was right in front of me. It wasn't the answer I was waiting for.  I'm still waiting for that miracle.  It also wasn't a coincidence, nor was it something I made happen thru circumstances.  It just happened, in one of those wonderful God moments, where nothing is going right, you're in a place where you didn't plan to be at a time you didn't plan to be there and BOOM! 

I had asked for this, and God answered.  So for everyone who is waiting on a promise from God, don't give up. For those who feel hopeless, who are being encouraged to give up, to move on.  To those who think that maybe you didn't hear Gods voice clearly despite confirmation.  Maybe this was human error.  Stand, hang on, don't give up! God has an appointed timing.  It doesn't ever look like we thought it would, or come when we expect it to, Don't fear!  Because it always happens like HE SAID IT WOULD! 

When the time is right, I, the Lord will make it happen quickly" Isaiah 60:22

Seasons of Miraculous in a Time of Impossibility

This may be a little off calendar but i found it in my old Facebook posts and wanted to share.  

I was reading and meditating over the Christmas story.  It's something you learn to do in Practicum class when you are in Bible College.  Your professors encourage you to read over and over a passage and pull out every last drop of truth from a scripture.  And a few things began to stand out. 

At Christmas we have all these old christmas carols we sing, and every year new ones begin to pop up.  I'm not talking about the "We wish You a Merry Christmas" or "Frosty the Snowman" kind.  Oh I love those, don't get me wrong.  I'm taking about the clearly Religious in theme.  That talk about the birth of Jesus as the true meaning of Christmas.  We have all heard the songs that portray the moment that Mary learns she is pregnant as a joyous event.  But from everything we have learned, we know this is indeed not the case.  In the Jewish culture, this was not a joyous event but a shameless moment that probably led to a myriad of emotions.   Jewish law stated that she should be stoned.  She knew this.  Even if Joseph, who had yet to be  clued in to the goings on of the Holy Spirit, chose to marry her and claim the baby as his, a cloud of gossip and shame would hang over them throughout the community. 

When the Angel visited Mary and gave her the joyous news, her response was "Let it be as you have said" (Luke 1:38).  Now one thing I know regarding prophetic words and messages, is that God always gives us a choice. Just as He gave Mary a choice. She could have said no thank you.  I'm getting married and have my whole life ahead of me.  but she chose the path God had laid out for her and trusted the plan he had for her life.  The next scripture in Luke tells us that she wasted no time in packing her things and heading to her cousin Elizabeth's house.  What it doesn't tell us is the human thoughts and emotions that tore thru Mary from the moment the angel left her until she made it to Elizabeth.  Because once the excitement, awe and glory of an angelic visitation was gone Mary was left alone with her very human, very female thoughts and fears.  I imagine that as the shining light of the angel we see in our Bible picture books began to fade, Mary realized she had a dozen questions she hadn't asked.  That even as she hurriedly made the necessary arrangements to travel to Elizabeth, fear crept in.  Trepidation of what was truly to come. Would Joseph divorce her? Would She be drug to village square and stoned? What would others say?  And then the cart he was riding in pulled up to Elizabeth's house.  The door flung open and there stood her once barren cousin, well past the age of possible pregnancy, swollen with child.  An miraculous moment, in a time of impossibility, and she was reminded that God had not chosen her for harm, but for good,  That what God had planned was reason to rejoice despite the circumstances that surrounded her.  That no matter what it looked like right now, she had reason to rejoice because she had been chosen, because God is faithful and what He says He will do, He will do!

January, Getting Healthy and Recovering from the Holidays...

It was the first week of January when I started writing this post and like most people it’s time to get healthy.  Not just because it’s the thing to do or because I over indulged during the holidays.  I had surgery in May and have put on close to 15lbs.  It amazes me how quickly you can gain when your mobility is limited.  But it happens and now is the time to do something about it.  

So here’s the transparency... I’m 5’5” and weigh 250lbs.  I’m allergic to Dairy, Gluten Intolerant and suffer from Acid Reflux.  You would think this would make dieting easy but it’s quite frankly extremely difficult to stay away from this stuff no matter how sick it makes me! I mean cheese is life! And have you had my cinnamon rolls? It's ok if you haven't, I'll be posting the recipe on my recipe page someday soon.  And then you'll understand the struggle. :) 

   I do pretty well, avoiding gluten, but then I have to eat out and there’s no options or I get something accidentally. I can't tell you how many tears have been shed over meals in restaurants because I can't eat another hamburger patty. And we travel a lot, I spent two nights this week in different hotels.  It's just hard.  

And that my friends is real life for those of us who say we are busy and actually mean it.  I run a business, homeschool my four teenagers, manage three websites, and work as a personal assistant.  It's a good day when I don't fall asleep on the couch.  

It also doesn't help that I happen to have the metabolism of a water buffalo.  So what can us real girls do to fix it.  Extreme Diets work,  they do.  I've done them,  The Zone, Vegan, Low Glycemic, Whole 30,  Keto lasted 48 hours.  And not because i couldn't stick to it,  Because I became completely overwhelmed with what I could and couldn't eat and it was just too much.  But feeding a family of six, working around our different food restrictions, its hard and Pizza is good.  So now 21 days in to January, here is what I am doing, and what seems to be working

Daily Dose of Liv-On Lypo-Spheric R-ALA  - It's supposed to help with help with poor insulin sensitivity.  This is someone a close friend mentioned to me, and so I'm giving this a shot.  You squeeze the beige slime into the provided shot glass along with water and throw it back.  If you are great at throwing back shots this is great.  If you're like me and not a drinker, well my kids are quite entertained by the gagging if I put too much water or get a taste of the slimy mixture.  The stuff tastes disgusting, but what I have noticed is that I have more energy, after three days so we will see.

FIT TEA -  This stuff is supposed to help you lose weight.  I don't know if it does but a cup a day keeps things moving, and doesn't make me feel like i;m dying of intestinal flu.  It tastes good, can be drunk either hot or cold.  

DIET - Well I started out Whole 30, but I was actually stranded for two days due to the California mudslides and then there was this surprise trip to Disneyland.  But I have stuck with it for the most part.  On days I can't, I stick as close as possible, but for the most part, I am making sure my meals consist of lean protein, good fat, and lots of veggies.  Also, three servings of fruit.   This also means giving up my Coca Cola Habit, and drinking water and tea.

Results thus far -  I am down 7 lbs.  I'm pretty sure the 5 miles of Disneyland Walking didn't hurt this number.  My clothes are loosing.   For me this is progress.  It's a small victory.  But I will take it. I refuse to beat myself of for the miss steps, days I can't get a 2 miles walk in and when life just happens.  I'm going to celebrate the small victories and not give up because one meal is screwed up.  These are no longer the days of I'll start tomorrow, so pass me the cookies.  

I hope if you're reading this and struggling with weight, dieting or just healthier living you see that it's ok.  Keep working on it, step by step.  Little changes are easier to maintain.  Fight each small battle as you go, and pretty soon the big battles won't seem so big.  Don't try to give up smoking, sugar, carbs, and alcohol, then start taking cross fit classes when you haven't exercised in months.  It's only setting yourself up for failure.  Baby steps, and we will get there together.  


Vitamins by Liv on Labs